What about the PK’s?
Welcome back everyone! I haven't gone anywhere, THE DREAM is still alive in me. Honestly, I just took the summer off for some much needed rest with my family and to spend some time working on my golf game. The family time was fantastic and the golf game is coming around slowly...though I did get a hole in one this summer! And no, it wasn't on the mini-golf course. Yes, there were people there to witness it. No it wasn't a mulligan. So that should address all the questions...and jokes.
As I spent significant time with my family this summer on vacation, I was burdened by the Lord with a fresh cry for my children to know Him and follow Him with all their heart. As it is with any believing parent, my greatest desire for my children is to see them grow up with a love for the Lord, a love for His house, a love for His Presence and His Word. But their parents are pastors... so that means they are at a disadvantage, right? The cost of leadership and ministry will impact them in a negative way, correct?
That's what I was told anyway.
CHANGING THE NARRATIVE
So, to combat that, my wife and I decided we wanted to change the narrative around the idea of being a preacher's kid. We want to make sure our children become aware of the advantages and blessings of being pastor's kids. We decided to be intentional about reminding them every time they experienced a privilege because their parents are the pastors. We started saying phrases like:
"We are crazy blessed to get to serve at such an awesome church!"
"Isn't it amazing you get to hang out with so many amazing leaders that love you!"
"We have the best church!"
"Aren't you so grateful that we get to do this together as a family?"
"What?! You got candy for brining your Bible to church? Wow. This church is incredible!"
Our goal in changing the narrative is to teach our children to refocus their attention away from the negatives and help them learn to be grateful for every blessing and every advantage, big or small. This is a pretty critical life skill that is missing in far too many people. I want my children to see the blessings and thank God, thank their parents and thank others. And as thankfulness is cultivated in their hearts it will combat any sense of entitlement and the idea that God or the church "owes them."
Of course, there are challenges and struggles, and we let them experience some of that as well. But in the end, we want them to know it's a joy and a privilege that we get to do what we do every day! And if you talk to my kids today, none of them feel like it's a negative to be a "PK"; in fact, they love it! (Though my 9 year old would like to go back to one service so he can get more play time).
EVERY PREACHER'S KID IN HEAVEN
In the midst of God challenging me in this way, I came across a short message from Pastor Rob Ketterling of River Valley Church as he was speaking at an ARC Conference. The message is titled, "Every Preacher's Kid in Heaven!" and it immediately struck a chord with me. I would encourage you to take a little time to watch it, especially if you are a leader in any capacity in a church. His message starts at about the 8:30 mark if you want to skip ahead and it's only about 13 minutes long from there till the end. If you click the link below you'll also find a document called 31 virtues to pray over your children.
I would love to hear your tips and tricks on raising kids that love Jesus! So please feel free to leave a comment, story or tip below!
So good. Just this past week I was telling my sons how being grateful can change how your day goes, your perspective on life and situations you walk through. If we focus on negative, it’s all we see, but there are so many more blessings if we just stop and think about it.
Absolutely! Gratefulness is so important, but it takes work and being intentional.
Wow! This couldn’t be more helpful. I have had a burden for my kids to grow up and choose to serve the Lord but that burden intensified after my husband and I stepped into a pastoring role. I have found that there’s no substitute to intentionality if my pks are going to love the Lord. So, I’m intentional about prayer, worshipping God for themselves, reading the word and living out its virtues, serving the church even at an early age etc. Today, I have learnt something else from your blog-cultivating gratitude. Thanks Ps Bryan
Yes! We are blessed to be in a church that functions like a family and values kids! My kids look forward to seeing their best friends every week and have leaders that love them, challenge them and encourage them in their walk with Jesus.
Saw you thru Bo Stern Facebook message. Interested in what blog you did on women in ministry and John MacArthur. Bless you!
Just posted it.